Serie B 2015-16: Half-Time Report

Cagliari look set to bounce straight back into Italy’s top flight after dominating the first half of the Serie B season.

With Serie B currently in the middle of its three-week winter break, marking the exact halfway point of the campaign, there is time at last to take stock of what’s happened so far in the league described in Zero Assoluto’s slightly lame official theme song as ‘the love you never give up’. Italy’s second-tier is a long, long way off being perfect – with the lack of finances compared to a league such as the Championship resulting in a depressing amount of clubs going bust; with the average tenure of managers working in it doing nothing to combat the stereotype of Italian football’s unhealthy sacking culture; with attendances figures several light-years off the tallies reached in the lower leagues of England; and with the recent spate of match-fixing scandals having seen as many teams’ fates decided in the courtrooms as on the pitch, to name but a few problems – but despite its many deep-rooted and practically incurable flaws, it is still possible to smile through it all and enjoy the ride. A bit like a love you can’t give up, really. At least so I’m told.

Provided you focus exclusively on the football, which can sometimes be of an acceptable standard, there is no reason you cannot make a positive experience out of what Serie B has to offer; be it through watching the increasingly high number of young players who are given a chance to kick-start their careers at this level (such as Domenico Berardi and Paulo Dybala in the recent past), marvelling at the collection of teams who are expected to be bad but by some form of black magic end up being quite good (see Carpi and Frosinone last season), or just uncovering some of the weird and wonderful stories of the people who have wound up in this strangest of divisions (such as former MK Dons and Maltese Premier League superstar Igor Coronado, Ivorian civil war survivor Jean Armel Drole or failed X Factor contestant Leonardo Morosini, who spends most of his free time posting videos of himself singing on Instagram). It is a good league to follow if you really want it to be, and here is a long-winded summary of its current state of play with 21 out of 42 games down.

On top of the table heading in 2016 is Cagliari, who deserve huge credit for their season so far despite being red-hot favourites of both the world and his dog since day one. Given the unsightly mess the Sardinians descended into in Serie A last year it was a surprise to many to see them make so many sensible decisions in the wake of their deserved relegation, but for that the praises of President Tommaso Giulini and his assorted backroom staff must be sung loud and clear. As well as overseeing a discreet summer transfer window that saw the bulk of the squad retained but also refreshed in various areas, Giulini had the intelligence to look more than a mere managerial name and entrust Avellino boss Massimo Rastelli with the task of guiding the Islanders to promotion, which has since proven to be an inspired move. There were some Cagliari fans who had not even heard of Rastelli before his arrival in June, but they will be glad they do now, having watched him instil a clear identity and a commendable work ethic into a team that had demonstrated such a pitiful lack of both last season, as the Sardinians’ 12-year stay in the top flight came to an end with a whimper.

Add those attributes to the strongest squad in the league by a comfortable distance and you have a recipe for a resounding success, which is precisely what Rastelli and his players are on course for. Some brief teething problems in defence aside they have been the most complete outfit throughout the campaign, with a robust and reliable base allied to an avalanche of attacking talent that no other side can come even close to matching. With the crowd back on their side, they have also turned the Stadio Sant’Elia back into the impregnable fortress it should have been last season in Serie A, swatting aside 10 of the 11 rivals who have turned up in Sardinia so far.

Given the immense quality and strength in depth at their disposal the only possible stumbling block for Cagliari this season is complacency, and it is here that Rastelli has really earned his stripes so far, tearing into his players before their Christmas Eve clash with Salernitana for a lack of commitment in training and getting the desired response on the pitch. Not even the devastating season-ending injury to captain Daniele Dessena, the beating heart of the team, has managed to throw them off course, which lends credence to Devis Mangia’s post-match analysis of his Ascoli side’s defeat against them in November – “if we’re being honest, this team has no business being in this division.” Provided they can keep their focus, they will not be for much longer.

And yet, despite all of that, Cagliari are only one point clear of second place, because behind them Crotone are creating something quite extraordinary. Like Carpi and Frosinone last year, the Squali have not made a single appearance in Serie A throughout their 93-year history, but the position they have put themselves in at the halfway point would make it downright disappointing if they didn’t pull it off this year. In terms of economics and prestige they are the polar opposite of Cagliari, and that chasm was on show in their 4-0 defeat at the Sant’Elia on the opening weekend of the season, yet their results since that night have been almost identical and have them a full seven points clear of third place, which at this stage is a record for the league in its current format.

They are a club who is well versed in making a lot out of a little thanks to their fantastic President and sporting director, with an extremely astute transfer policy that is facilitated by the fantastic relationships they have built up with Serie A clubs over the years. They have nurtured and launched the careers of players such as Federico Bernardeschi, Danilo Cataldi and Alessandro Florenzi – a list to which we may soon be able to add the likes of Federico Ricci, Eloge Yao and Leonardo Capezzi, all of whom are exploding in an environment which has been proven to be one of the best places around for youngsters to develop.

One of the reasons for this is their commitment to playing magnificent football. This has always been a hallmark of theirs in a league that is often low on innovation, but even greater strides have been made to ensure they entertain this season with the arrival of another unfamiliar name in Ivan Juric. Having spent five years as Gian Piero Gasperini’s assistant before embarking upon his own coaching career, it is no surprise that the Croatian follows his master’s footballing beliefs almost to the letter and employs the same chameleonic 3-4-3 system that is practised by Genoa, but that doesn’t make the end result any less predictable or spectacular. If Cagliari have the most individual quality in Serie B then Crotone possess undoubtedly the strongest collective unit, having scored with more players than anyone else in the division (13) and with a vast majority of those goals coming through meticulously prepared team moves.

While it is their effervescent attacking play that catches the eye though, all orchestrated by Juric and his trusty stopwatch from the sidelines, the defensive solidity and ruthlessness which has begun to shine through in recent weeks cannot be underestimated either. Perhaps that is even more striking from such a young team, a young team that everyone keeps expecting to stumble but simply refuses to do so. Not that anyone with a heart wants them to. Perhaps we’ll know for sure if this team is equipped for promotion after they return from their winter break, when they will host Cagliari on the opening weekend of 2016. They are two completely different footballing entities, but their objective heading into the New Year is exactly the same.

Behind the top two, the play-off picture (which comprises third to eighth in Serie B) is rather less clear. Once again though there are some fantastic stories to be told, with Novara and Brescia giving Crotone a run for their money in the fight to be the story of the season. Marco Baroni’s side are the closest pursuers of the automatic places, despite only having been promoted from Lega Pro last season and beginning the season with a two-point deduction, thanks to an extraordinary recent run of form that saw them pick up 11 wins out of 13, all built upon the defensive organisation for which the former Pescara manager is renowned. On the other hand, fifth-placed Brescia were not even meant to be in Serie B this season after they were relegated last year, but the demise of Parma handed the second youngest squad in the division (second to Crotone, incidentally) a second chance that under the guidance of Roberto Boscaglia they have grabbed with both hands. Boscaglia had never worked outside of Sicily before his sacking at Trapani in January but he has been far from out of place at the Rigamonti, where they are still yet to lose, creating along with Crotone one of the most attractive sides in the league (which perhaps, given the average ages of the squads, is not a coincidence).

Should either of these surprise packages lose momentum however, there are several less surprising names waiting to take advantage. Tucked in one point behind Novara, the team that stands the best chance of the top two are Massimo Oddo’s Pescara, who are bringing themselves right into play after a very wobbly start to the season that saw them win just one of their first five games. Propelled along by the exuberance of another squad jam-packed with youngsters – not to mention the 11 goals of Serie B’s capocannoniere and player of the season Gianluca Lapadula – it’s impossible not to like the Delfini, a joyously irreverent side who often seem to be more preoccupied with enjoying themselves than with winning matches, but are gradually being moulded by the 2006 World Cup winner into something more consistent and concrete.

Two points back meanwhile are Bari, although their current trend is in the other direction. For the majority of the season they have looked the most likely side to gatecrash the top two, albeit not playing quite as seductive a style of football as some of their rivals, but a recent run of four defeats in five has culminated in a disappointed President Gianluca Paparesta pulling the trigger on coach Davide Nicola, the man who masterminded Livorno’s promotion season in 2013. On the face of it the decision seems both severe and ill-advised, even if the ex-Genoa and Torino player did not have the desired effect when arriving midway through last season, but with the backdrop of a highly exacting fan base that often views winning 2-0 as a missed opportunity to win 3-0, perhaps it is not all that surprising.

Elsewhere one cannot rule seventh-placed Cesena out of the equation either, although if Massimo Drago’s side wish to bounce straight back into Serie A they will have to find a reliable striker in the January transfer window, before rectifying the alarmingly poor away form that has seen them take just 7 points from a possible 30 so far. Level on points with the Seahorses (although only due to Cesena having had one point deducted for financial wrongdoings) heading into the New Year are Avellino, who along with Perugia have sprung into contention just when it looked like they were running out of time. Both are latecomers to the party after frustratingly inconsistent campaigns, having both seemingly managed to find the right compromise between attack and defence, although in that regard they are diametrically opposed.

Avellino have had no trouble scoring goals under new boss Attilio Tesser – a disproportionately high number of which have been Goal of the Season contenders, such as this, this, this or this – but their defensive leakiness has been strangling their vast potential, while the obsession for clean sheets that effectively got Pierpaolo Bisoli the sack at Cesena last season has deprived Perugia of carrying any attacking venom, leading to four goalless draws from their opening seven games and a few questions being raised against him. Due to eighth-place being enough to get you into the play-offs though, you can’t fully rule out one of Trapani or Virtus Entella sneaking in through the back door either, although their seasonal objectives are somewhat more modest than that. Whoever makes the cut, we are almost certainly going to be kept guessing until the 42nd and last weekend of the season.

Further down the table, there are three teams that stick out like a sore thumb in the bottom half. Spezia, Livorno and Vicenza all set off with slightly different targets and expectations, but what unites them together is just how much they have all under-performed up until now. Replacing Nenad Bjelica with Mimmo Di Carlo appeared to have given Spezia’s season the shot in the arm it needed after a bizarre 5-1 defeat at Cesena had propelled them into a seven-game winless run, culminating in the historic victory over Roma in the Coppa Italia, but since then one of the strongest and least Italian squads in the division seems to have taken their eye off the ball again, leaving them in a lowly 12th place that belies the copious talent at their fingertips. Livorno’s season meanwhile is turning into an unmitigated disaster, with wantaway President Aldo Spinelli’s decision to sack Christian Panucci looking worse and worse with each week that passes. Having guided a moderate group of players to four wins from their opening four, the former Milan and Roma stalwart deserved far better treatment than he got to correct an initial slump, but instead an out of touch Bortolo Mutti was called upon and the wait for a win now stands at ten games.

As for Vicenza, who unexpectedly retained Pasquale Marino as manager after an unsavoury summer that saw him resign and then return, the table is even more worrying than for 16th-placed Livorno, with the Biancorossi all the way down in the ominous relegation play-off (or ‘play-out’) spots thanks to their inability to turn possession into victories at home. Having reached the semi-finals of the promotion play-offs last season another positive campaign was on the cards, but the departure of top-scorer Andrea Cocco – who strangely enough has had a terrible season thus far at Pescara – has turned them into a highly predictable team without any cutting edge, just as their boss had feared it would.

The other big story down in the bottom half is Hernan Crespo, whose first senior managerial job at Modena has been tough going so far. A positive run of form in the run-up to Christmas has given the Gialloblu some much-needed breathing space above the drop zone, but the second half of the season will be another uphill struggle for the former Chelsea and Inter striker, whose side are fully behind their star-studded coach but have an unbelievable difficulty scoring goals. It’s not exactly a problem Crespo has had in the past, but football can be strange like that sometimes. Ultimately, with the players at his disposal he is doing as much as could be expected for him, but given his traumatic start to 2015 at Parma he is probably having the time of his life all the same.

As for the relegation places he is working so hard to avoid, one of the automatic spots is almost certainly going to be filled by Como, who despite an early managerial change have won just twice all season and are nine points off total safety – despite the best efforts of their bomber Simone Andrea Ganz, son of journeyman centre-forward Maurizio who has clearly taught him everything he knows given the similarities in his game. Alongside them, Roberto D’Aversa’s Virtus Lanciano outfit are going to struggle to stay up as well based on current evidence, especially given that they are about to sell some of their big players in the January transfer window, while Salernitana will follow suit if they don’t work out soon how to get through a match without either conceding or having someone sent off. Claudio Lotito’s second team have been found particularly wanting in the disciplinary area this season with eight red cards to their name already; a problem rather colourfully demonstrated by the extraordinary brawl that broke out at the Stadio Arechi, after Cagliari’s Andres Tello had had the temerity to celebrate scoring the clinching goal for his side in typically Colombian fashion. On Christmas Eve of all days, with the President of the league watching in the stands. Honestly guys.

Occupying the other play-out place a point clear of Vicenza are Latina, who very rarely play badly but with so many erratic players can hardly ever convert their performances into points, while the other three teams yet to be mentioned – Ternana, Pro Vercelli and Ascoli – have all had very similar seasons. Each underwent an early managerial change (although in Ternana’s case it was a resignation) after poor starts, each have enjoyed an upturn in fortunes since choosing replacements and each can now be optimistic of beating the drop, although they could all also do with appreciating the value of the occasional draw, which in this division is rather high indeed.

By now the table appears to have taken something resembling a definitive shape, with teams just about beginning to establish what their real objectives for the year should be. But in a league as tight as Serie B, with so many potential promotion and relegation spots at stake, a run of three straight wins or defeats is all it takes to completely change the complexion of a team’s season, which means everybody should be kept on their toes right until the flag falls on Friday 20th May. That and also that everything written above could turn out to be completely insignificant. Let’s hope for just the former.

Serie B Mid-Season Awards

Biggest Surprise: Crotone

Biggest Disappointment: Spezia

Best Player: Gianluca Lapadula (Pescara)

Best Youngster(s): Stefano Sensi (Cesena), Jean Armel Drole (Perugia), Rolando Mandragora (Pescara)

Best Manager: Ivan Juric (Crotone)

Best Goal: Andres Tello (Cagliari) vs Virtus Lanciano

Strangest and Most Suspicious Goal: Simone Andrea Ganz (Como) vs Modena

Most Touching Goal Celebration: Leonardo Morosini (Brescia)

Worst Miss: Pablo Gonzalez (Novara) vs Crotone

Best Game: Bari 4-3 Spezia (Matchday 1). Although Y vs X – the clash between two sides who still nobody knew the identity of less than a fortnight before the start of the season, due to two separate match-fixing cases taking the entire summer to resolve – would have run it close.

Best Slalom: Massimiliano Gatto (Pro Vercelli) vs Virtus Lanciano

Best Brawl: Salernitana vs Cagliari

Best Francesco Totti impersonation: Matteo Ardemagni (Perugia)

Best Sergio Ramos Impersonation: Francesco Zampano (Pescara)

Top XI (4-3-1-2): Marco Storari (Cagliari); Stefano Sabelli (Bari), Eloge Koffi Yao Guy (Crotone), Luca Ceppitelli (Cagliari), Davide Faraoni (Novara); Leonardo Capezzi (Crotone), Davide Di Gennaro (Cagliari), Nicolas Viola (Novara); Diego Farias (Cagliari); Ante Budimir (Crotone), Gianluca Lapadula (Pescara)

Serie A Saturday: as it happened

Roma and Lazio strengthened their grip on the Champions League places, Cesena came from three goals down to earn a point and Inter plunged themselves further into crisis

Final Scores: Atalanta 1-2 Torino, Cagliari 1-3 Lazio, Genoa 1-1 Udinese, Inter 1-1 Parma, Palermo 1-2 Milan, Sassuolo 1-0 Chievo, Verona 3-3 Cesena

Earlier: Roma 1-0 Napoli

Later: Fiorentina v Sampdoria (1730), Juventus v Empoli (2000)

1600: So, Lazio are now seven points ahead of Sampdoria in fourth as Sinisa Mihajlovic’s side await their game with Fiorentina tonight. Roma’s win means there’s now a lot of points to make up for them, Napoli and Fiorentina. Torino and Milan’s wins consolidate their positions in the top half, while Inter slip even further off the pace after a quite appalling draw with Parma. That’s now 4 points the Ducali have taken off them this season – and they only have 10! Cesena are still just about alive in the survival race, closing to within four points of Atalanta after their loss to Torino. Everyone above them should really be safe, with at least a 10-point gap heading into the last 9 rounds. Thanks for following.

1556: To recap: Atalanta 1-2 Torino, Cagliari 1-3 Lazio, Genoa 1-1 Udinese, Inter 1-1 Parma, Palermo 1-2 Milan, Sassuolo 1-0 Chievo, Verona 3-3 Cesena. Which all means this for the Serie A table:

1554: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. It’s crisis time at Inter, because it’s ended 1-1 at San Siro. Parma, Cagliari and Cesena have now all avoided defeat away to the Nerazzurri this season. Torino, Sassuolo and Lazio have all seen out their wins now.

It’s all over. We made it.

1552: Cesena have salvaged a point when it looked impossible, as it ends 3-3 in Verona. Elsewhere, Milan have claimed their first away win since they went to play Hellas back in October.

1551: Red card for Torino! It’s unlikely to make a difference but Migjen Basha has been given his marching orders for a second booking. All over in Genoa, where it’s ended 1-1.

1550: GOAL!!! Cagliari 1-3 Lazio (Parolo): All over, finally, in Sardinia as Marco Parolo scores from a drilled free-kick. Lazio are moving well clear of the chasing pack in third.

1549: Giampaolo Pazzini goes close to securing the win for Milan, but Sorrentino denies him.

1547: Atalanta are pressing for an equaliser in Bergamo but Torino are repelling their attacks pretty well at the moment. Cesena will move one point closer to them as things stand.

1546: Tick tock tick tock…

1544: Inter are 5 minutes away from failing to beat any of the sides in the bottom three at home this season. A new low.

1541: GOAL!!! Palermo 1-2 Milan (Menez): He’s done it again! Palermo were only level for 10 minutes and now they don’t have long to save themselves, because Jeremy Menez has just run the length of the pitch and lifted the ball beyond Sorrentino.

1540: GOAL!!! Verona 3-3 Cesena (Succi): IT’S HAPPENED! It’s 3-3! And it was 3-0 15 minutes ago! Mandorlini is absolutely furious on the touchline but Cesena have pulled off a ripsnorting comeback here, and maybe there’s time for the winner. Maybe. They really do need to win this, without wanting to be a grumpy gumbles.

1538: 10 minutes left, and once again neither Milanese side is winning at the moment. Lazio are moving clear in third and the relegation tussle is staying exactly as it is. There’s still time though, as Senad Lulic replaces Miroslav Klose in Sardinia. Quite how Cagliari are only one goal behind in this game is anyone’s guess.

1535: GOAL!!! Verona 3-2 Cesena (Brienza): Blimey. Maybe that goal from Carbonero will matter. Franco Brienza has spent his entire career down at the wrong end of Serie A, but he knows how to strike a ball as he’s demonstrated here – what a free-kick from 25 yards that is. Er, Verona haven’t won this yet…

1534: Goaaa- no! It’s been cleared by Albin Ekdal! Lazio looked nailed on for a third as Felipe Anderson and Keita broke free, but the latter’s shot was hacked off the line by the substitute and 10-man Cagliari are still alive, somehow…

1532: GOAL!!! Atalanta 1-2 Torino (Pinilla): Game on? Maybe, maybe not, but either way this is another wicked strike from the man they call Pinigol. In similar fashion to when he scored against Cagliari, the Chilean has produced a stonking acrobatic effort from inside the box and it’s 2-1 in Bergamo.

1531: GOAL!!! Verona 3-1 Cesena (Carbonero): Cesena have pulled one back through a lovely strike from Carlos Carbonero, but it won’t matter.

1531: GOAL!!! Palermo 1-1 Milan (Dybala pen): But Paulo Dybala cares not, and the Argentine has just scored Palermo’s first goal in 500 minutes! Milan have dropped 21 points from winning positions this season and they might be about to lose two more…

1530: Penalty for Palermo! Paletta has fouled substitute Belotti as Palermo broke forward, and they have a brilliant chance to end the drought! Looked a soft penalty mind…

1529: MISSED! Horribly so! Biglia goes for a completely different style of penalty to the one he scored previously, and the ball soars over the bar. Oops.

1528: Red card for Sassuolo! Federico Peluso has been dismissed for a second bookable offence as Chievo continue to pile forward, and…

Red card for Cagliari and another penalty for Lazio! Keita’s been brought down in the box again, only this time it was by Modibo Diakite and this time he’s sent off for denying a goal-scoring opportunity.

1527: GOAL!!! Genoa 1-1 Udinese (Thereau): No they’re not. Ah dear. Sylvan Widmer’s cross is missed by inches by Guilherme, but it runs through for Cyril Thereau to tap in from three yards. All square.

1526: Genoa thought they’d scored a second against Udinese a few minutes ago, but for some reason it was ruled out. They’re looking good to win this game though.

1523: GOAL!!! Verona 3-0 Cesena (Toni): 15 up for the season for Luca Toni, and it’s game over at the Bentegodi. Jankovic is the man to set him up again, this time on the counter-attack, crossing for the 37 year-old to volley in from close range. Easy street.

1521: Parma are playing much better than Inter at the moment. This is not a misprint. In Bergamo, Atalanta’s Rolando Bianchi has just come on to face his former side for the final half hour. Atalanta aren’t making much headway in the second half though.

1519: GOAL!!! Cagliari 1-2 Lazio (Biglia pen): Up steps Lucas Biglia from the spot and the Argentine makes no mistake, sending Brkic the wrong way and restoring Lazio’s advantage. That, incredibly, is their 37th goal scored by a midfielder this season.

1518: Penalty for Lazio! Lorenzo Crisetig tripped Keita Balde as he galloped into the box and there’s little doubt about that one.

1515: Destro’s right foot was just offside as he ran through on goal, so it’s a good call from the officials. Andrea Belotti replaces Robin Quaison for Palermo, who are now rapidly approaching 500 minutes without a goal.

1513: Juan Jesus crosses for Kovacic at San Siro, but the substitute heads wide from 12 yards. There’s a slight hint of offside about that Marco Sau goal by the way, but the assistant and referee both agreed it was legal. Speaking of offside, Mattia Destro has just been denied his third goal in a Milan shirt by the assistant’s flag. Milan are playing pretty well now though.

1511: Giuseppe Vives stings the palms of Sportiello in Bergamo but Torino remain only 2-0 up.

1509: GOAL!!! Cagliari 1-1 Lazio (Sau): All square in Sardinia! Zdenek Zeman’s favourite student Marco Sau has levelled for the home side, although he needed a rather hefty slice of luck along the way. A long ball over the top picked him out, before his shot took a sizeable deflection off the leg of Mauricio and looped over Federico Marchetti. Still, they all count and that’s an unexpected development…

1507: And now Gabriel Paletta has wasted a free header from a following corner. Ooh, hang on…

1506: Milan are on the front foot early in the second half at Palermo, Luca Antonelli going close from a corner. They’ve not won back-to-back matches since October but it’s on the cards at the moment.

At the moment.

1505: Mateo Kovacic has replaced Puscas at half-time for Inter, where the game is belatedly back under way. Nothing to speak of anywhere just yet.

1502: Anyway. Whatever that was about has now finished, and we’re off again. 45 minutes for Inter to put right the wrong of their first-half; 45 minutes for Torino, Lazio, Genoa, Milan, Sassuolo and Verona to hold onto and perhaps extend their respective advantages.

1500: Roberto Mancini has been stood in the San Siro tunnel for the last two minutes, staring out onto the pitch. Doing some soul-searching, it appears. He looked a bit existentially troubled. Conceding to Parma can do that to you.

1455: Sassuolo’s penalty was for a foul on Berardi by Alessandro Gamberini, and yes, it was the right decision. Never in doubt. Highlights of that half? Quagliarella’s goal, Vazquez’s miss and Quagliarella’s goal.

1450: The as-it-stands table makes pretty decent reading for Roma and Lazio fans:

1447: Aaaaaaand it’s half-time all round. Time to breathe.

1444: GOAL!!! Inter 1-1 Parma (Lila): CLAMOROSO A MILANO! Or not, because this is Inter we’re dealing with after all. The away side have reacted really well to falling behind and now have the equaliser they were looking for, as Andi Lila heads home from a perfectly-weighted Silvestre Varela cross. A nice team move all round, but Roberto Mancini looks mad.

1442: Edgar Barreto scores for Palermo but it’s been ruled out, I think rightly, for offside on Luca Rigoni. Palermo have now gone… er, ages without scoring. I can’t remember how much exactly it is.

1440: GOAL!!! Atalanta 0-2 Torino (Glik): Meanwhile in Bergamo, Europe’s top-scoring defender is on the score sheet once again as Torino double their lead. A corner dropped invitingly for skipper Kamil Glik, and the Polishman wasted no time in roofing it from close range. Clinical.

1438: GOAL!!! Palermo 0-1 Milan (Cerci): Ha! I won’t do that in future. It’s scruffy as heck but Pippo Inzaghi won’t care, as Milan lead with their first attack in quite a while. Marco van Ginkel sprints to the by-line and drills a low ball in towards the near post, where Stefano Sorrentino fumbles it onto Alessio Cerci’s knee and into the net. It’s Cerci’s first goal since arriving on loan from Atletico Madrid in January, so he’ll be milking that regardless of how it was scored.

1435: Each of the bottom four are behind and being dominated at the moment, which means… nothing changes. RE the Vazquez miss earlier, I might not have given Diego Lopez the credit he deserved for the way he came out and closed the angle, just as Dybala squared it for his partner in crime. Still a bad miss though. Milan haven’t shown much going forward so far, which is surprising, to someone, probably.

1431: GOAL!!! Verona 2-0 Cesena (Gomez): Ah, Cesena. Verona double their lead and it’s deservedly so, as Juanito Gomez flummoxes Daniele Capelli and bends a lovely shot beyond Nicola Leali into the corner. Trouble, trouble and more trouble for Mimmo Di Carlo.

1430: GOAL!!! Cagliari 0-1 Lazio (Klose): I was just thinking that Lazio were taking their time in making their dominance count, but they’re ahead on the half hour after yet more magic from Felipe Anderson. The Brazilian wonderkid dances past two Cagliari defenders with delightful ease before squaring for Mauri, who spins adroitly in the six-yard box to set up Miroslav Klose for the kind of tap-in he’s spent the last 15 years of his life scoring. Big goal in the ‘race’ for third.

1427: GOAL!!! Inter 1-0 Parma (Guarin): Well that was inevitable. Parma held out for 25 minutes at San Siro but for the umpteenth time this season they’ve fallen behind, and the bad luck in this goal is befitting of their campaign as a whole. Fredy Guarin lets fly from 25 yards after being set up by Gary Medel and a hefty deflection completely deceives Mirante in the Parma goal, leaving the ball to bounce in at the near post.

1425: MISS! A horrendous miss! Palermo should have just ended their goal drought as Dybala cut the ball back for a completely unmarked Franco Vazquez, but somehow the Italy international rolled the ball wide from six yards. Unbelievable.

1422: GOAL!!! Sassuolo 1-0 Chievo (Berardi pen): Chievo have finally conceded again, for the first time since February, and it came from the spot as the ice-cool Domenico Berardi rolls Sassuolo into the lead. I didn’t see what it was for, so to be nice let’s just assume it was the right decision.

1421: Penalty for Sassuolo!

1420: GOAL!!! Atalanta 0-1 Torino (Quagliarella): WHACK! What a goal from Fabio Quagliarella! Marco Sportiello has made more saves than any other goalkeeper in Serie A this season, but he could do nothing about the rocket of a free-kick that just flashed past him off the bar. Wow. Torino lead!

1419: GOAL!!! Genoa 1-0 Udinese (De Maio): … It’s not anymore. From the home side’s next attack, a deep cross drops to Sebastien De Maio after a fortunate ricochet and the defender fires Genoa ahead. Meanwhile…

1419: Tino Costa is next to try his luck against Orestis Karnezis from a free-kick, but the Greek shot-stopper flew across his goal just in time to push it wide. Still 0-0 in Genoa, but…

1417: Francesco Acerbi has the chance to head Sassuolo in front from a corner at the Mapei, but he got his contact with the ball all wrong and the chance is wasted. From the resulting goal-kick, Chievo break to devastating effect and Riccardo Meggiorini almost scores a sensational goal on the volley. Unfortunately, it hit the bar and we’re denied an exciting moment from one of Europe’s least exciting teams.

1415: As I say that, Shaqiri goes close at the near post but Antonio Mirante had it covered. In Palermo, Paulo Dybala attempts one of his trademark curling left-footed classics to deceive Diego Lopez, but it’s wide of the far post.

1413: Torino are dominating Atalanta at the Atleti Azzurri d’Italia but without any clear-cut opportunities to show for it yet. The same can be said of Inter at San Siro, where excitingly teenager George Puscas has been given a start by Roberto Mancini, ahead of Lukas Podolski.

1411: Traversa! Diego Perotti is unlucky not to give Genoa the lead at the Marassi as his free-kick skims the crossbar.

1410: What a save from Gonzalo Brkic! Lazio are in control at the Sant’Elia and the Cagliari keeper has just pulled off a wonderful stop to deny Biancoceleste skipper Stefano Mauri with his left leg.

1408: Stefano Sorrentino saves from Menez as the ball falls to the Frenchman on the edge of the box. At the Bentegodi, Hellas are battering Cesena in the opening stages and could already be two or three goals clear.

1406: Sergio Floccari goes close twice in quick succession for Sassuolo but it’s still goalless in Reggio Emilia. Silvestre Varela meanwhile has had the first shot on target of the game at San Siro, but Samir Handanovic dealt with that pretty comfortably. Palermo are calling the shots early on at the Favorita, with Milan happy to play on the break for now.

1404: GOAL!!! Verona 1-0 Cesena (Toni): But he doesn’t always miss! Jacopo Sala won the ball back for Verona right on the edge of the Cesena box, he slid in Bosko Jankovic down the wing and the Serb squares it for Toni to steer in at the near post. Simple stuff, and that’s very much bad news for the visitors.

1402: The first meaningful chance of the day comes to Luca Toni at the Bentegodi, but he scuffs it wide from a tight angle. Meanwhile, no one has turned up at the Mapei stadium for Sassuolo-Chievo. Evidently the home fans weren’t convinced by Di Francesco’s claim that they’re not safe yet.

1400: We’re up and running all over the place. Make this as hectic as possible, teams of Serie A.

1357: Let’s do this.

1355: Right then. Five minutes until whistles are blown all around Italy. Here’s how the table looks heading into the aforementioned seven fixtures:

Given that Fiorentina and Sampdoria are facing each other in one of the late games today, this is a magnificent opportunity for Lazio to consolidate third after Napoli’s defeat. It’s hard to see them not doing it either, he says with ill-advised conviction.

1349: Verona v Cesena

And finally, a game that falls most definitely into the category of ‘Must Win Or At Least Don’t Lose Unless Atalanta Win’ for Mimmo Di Carlo’s Cesena. It looked for a while as if the Seahorses might be able to save themselves from the drop in a most unlikely feat of escapology, but with 10 games left and a 5-point gap I’m not so convinced anymore. When you consider that Luca Toni has scored as many goals on his own in 2015 (8) as Cesena’s entire front-line has all season, it’s hard to back them with any conviction. Verona meanwhile sit 16th in the table, but a win today will get them over the line for another season following a run of 8 points in 4 games, which has relieved the pressure that was gathering on Andrea Mandorlini’s shoulders. The last four games between these sides have ended all-square, which would be of little use to today’s visitors.

Verona: Benussi; Sala, Moras, Rodriguez, Pisano; Hallfredsson, Greco, Brivio; Gomez Taleb, Toni, Jankovic

Cesena: Leali; Perico, Capelli, Krajnc, Lucchini; Pulzetti, Giorgi, De Feudis; Brienza; Defrel, Djuric

1345: Sassuolo v Chievo

On paper this looks like the least interesting game of the bunch, even if Eusebio Di Francesco is insistent that Sassuolo are not safe yet from the drop. (They pretty much are, barring miracles from Cagliari and Cesena.) This one is a clash between two sides who are level on points but in entirely different runs of form: Chievo have only lost 1 of their last 7 outings, while the Neroverdi have only won 1 of their last 7 outings. The Flying Donkeys haven’t conceded in any of their last four games but don’t score many themselves, so expect this to be low-scoring and just generally a bit bad. They’ll both stay up though.

Sassuolo: Consigli; Vrsaljko, Cannavaro, Acerbi, Peluso; Brighi, Missiroli, Biondini; Berardi, Floccari, Floro Flores.

Chievo: Bizzarri; Frey, Gamberini, Cesar, Zukanovic; Schelotto, Radovanovic, Izco, Birsa; Meggiorini, Paloschi.

1343: Palermo v Milan

Milan head to Sicily today looking for a first away win since October, but their season’s finished regardless of whether or not they manage to find it. Pippo Inzaghi may try to convince you that the Rossoneri are about to embark upon a new 10-game season, but don’t listen to him. He is the only man for whom said 10 games are of any importance whatsoever, as his future is likely to be decided based on how well he does in them. All the important issues at the club between now and May will take place off-field, with increasing rumours of an impending takeover. No one is really bothered about what happens here, as Sulley Muntari demonstrated yesterday, so perhaps it’s a good opportunity for Palermo to arrest a worrying run of results. Beppe Iachini’s men haven’t scored a goal of any kind in over 7 hours of football, since Paulo Dybala put them ahead against Lazio on 22 February, but a win will take them above today’s opponents and relieve the minimal pressure the manager might be feeling. He is at the behest of Maurizio Zamparini, lest we forget.

But as I said, nobody really cares about this game. It’s more mid-table than a parasol hole.

Palermo: Sorrentino; Rispoli, Gonzalez, Vitiello, Lazaar; Rigoni, Jajalo, Barreto; Vazquez, Quaison; Dybala.

Milan: Lopez; Abate, Paletta, Mexes, Antonelli; Van Ginkel, De Jong, Bonaventura; Cerci, Destro, Menez.

1339: Inter v Parma

A clash between two sides who haven’t managed a single win between them in over a month. Should be good. Roberto Mancini is insistent that his side still have a “60% chance” of qualifying for the Europa League, but even with a win today it’s pretty much impossible to imagine Inter repaying his faith. They’re improving, but they’re still pretty bad, and that’s why they’re 10th heading into the final stretch. But it could be worse. Parma’s fate was sealed a long, long time ago thanks to events on and particularly off the pitch, and between now and May, they exist only to ruin other teams’ seasons by taking points off them. What a thoroughly dispiriting existence that must be. Still, that’s better than how it’ll be after May, when they won’t exist at all.

I’m joking, of course. Or am I?

Inter: Handanovic; Santon, Ranocchia, Felipe, Juan Jesus; Guarin, Medel, Brozovic; Shaqiri; Palacio, Puscas.

Parma: Mirante; Gobbi, Costa, Mednes, Feddal; Jose Mauri, Jorquera, Lila; Nocerino, Varela; Belfodil.

1335: Genoa v Udinese

A game that means almost nothing, but one between two sides who love to share goals. Both of the previous two meetings between Genoa and Udinese have contained six goals, with Gian Piero Gasperini’s men having triumphed 4-2 at the Friuli back in November. The Grifone are without a win in four and as a result are not going to qualify for European competition next season, while their opponents are unbeaten in 3 after a dodgy spell and took a creditable point against Fiorentina before the international break. If nothing else, this should be fun.

Genoa: Lamanna; Roncaglia, Burdisso, De Maio; Edenilson, Tino Costa, Rincon, Bergdich; Iago Falque, Borriello, Perotti

Udinese: Karnezis; Heurtaux, Wague, Piris; Widmer, Guilherme, Pinzi, Kone, Gabriel Silva; Thereau, Perica

1334: Cagliari v Lazio

Two sides in extremely different form collide at the Sant’Elia today. Lazio come into this match in the midst of a remarkable six-game winning run, which has seen them rocket up to third in the table as their rivals have faltered. And they’re not finished yet either; Stefano Pioli’s side now have an automatic Champions League qualification spot in their sights (which is currently held by their bitter capital rivals), as they chase down their club record of nine victories on the spin. That, of all people, was set by Sven Goran Eriksson back in 1999. For Cagliari, life is less rosy. Stunningly, Zdenek Zeman’s returned has not changed anything, and the Sardinians are now 5 points off safety with Lazio, Genoa and Napoli to face in their next three games. It ain’t looking good. Zeman said yesterday that Lazio are currently playing the best football in the division, and it’s tough to see his side doing anything about that today. Cagliari are without a win in 8 games, while Zeman personally is enduring a 10-match run without victory (if you include the back end of his first spell in charge this season), which all points to one thing: Serie B. Or a remarkable victory today. We’ll see which.

Cagliari: Brkic; Balzano, Rossettini, Diakitè, Avelar; Dessena, Crisetig, Joao Pedro; Farias, Sau, Cossu.

Lazio: Marchetti; Basta, de Vrij, Mauricio, Braafheid; Biglia, Parolo; Candreva, Mauri, Felipe Anderson; Klose

1330: Atalanta v Torino

One for the nostalgists, this. In Bergamo today we have a clash between the two oldest managers in Serie A, as Edy Reja (68) pits his extensive wits against Giampiero Ventura (66). The latter’s need is somewhat greater than the former, his Atalanta side currently sat 5 points off the drop zone with 10 games still to play, but the man whose coaching career started absolutely yonks ago (1979 to be precise) will have been quietly encouraged by what he’s seen since he replaced Stefano Colantuono a month ago. The Bergamaschi haven’t managed to win in that time (or in any of their last 7 games, in fact) but they haven’t managed to lose either, with 3 draws in Reja’s 3 games on the bench so far, and he reckons victory both today and away to Sassuolo next week would put them within touching distance of safety. In the words of Mark ‘Lawro’ Lawrenson, I think they’ll be OK. Torino meanwhile are still harbouring outside hopes of gatecrashing the European places above them, but that won’t happen. Just giving you a heads up.

Atalanta: Sportiello; Biava, Stendardo, Bellini; Zappacosta, Migliaccio, Cigarini, Carmona, Dramè; Maxi Moralez, Pinilla

Torino: Padelli; Maksimovic, Glik, Moretti; Peres, Gazzi, Vives, El Kaddouri, Molinaro; Maxi Lopez, Quagliarella

1325: Right then. 1 down, 9 to go. Here’s how the rest of today looks (times are BST):

14:00: Atalanta v Torino, Cagliari v Lazio, Genoa v Udinese, Inter v Parma, Palermo v Milan, Sassuolo v Chievo, Verona v Cesena

17:30: Fiorentina v Sampdoria

20:00: Juventus v Empoli

And here are the teams and talking points that matter from each of the seven upcoming kick-offs.

1321: But first, a brief nod in the direction of the day’s early kick-off, because it was, as they say in Italy, a “Big Match.” And it was a Big Win for Roma as well, who secured their first league win at home since November (!) with a nervy 1-0 win over Napoli. That makes Rudi Garcia’s side a little more comfortable in second ahead of the rest of today’s games, who prevailed thanks to a first-half strike from Miralem Pjanic. Napoli meanwhile are in horrid form. Rafa Benitez’s side played pretty well today, but they’ve now lost each of their last four away games and as such are rapidly falling out of the race for the Champions League spots. They stay fifth, five points off third (and now with a game less). Eek.

1315: 

That’s right. Saturday. And this isn’t just any Saturday: it’s Easter Saturday. And this isn’t just any Easter Saturday: it’s an Easter Saturday on which there is a full round of matches from Serie A.  And this isn’t just any Easter Saturday on which there is a full round of matches from Serie A: this is an Easter Saturday on which there is a full round of matches from Serie A and 7 of the 10 games are kicking off at the same time. One has already been played  and are two are to be played later tonight, which leaves a big fat 7 for Italy’s traditional Easter Saturday 3pm slot. I’m giddy here. Thank the high heavens for Diretta Gol. 45 minutes separate now and said 7 games, which is just enough time to talk up each individual match

Milan 3-1 Cagliari: as it happened

Pippo Inzaghi finally secured another win in unconvincing fashion as Cagliari edged closer to the relegation trapdoor

Final Score: Milan 3-1 Cagliari (Menez 21, 78 pen, Mexes 49; Farias 47)

2139: FULL-TIME – Milan 3-1 Cagliari: PEEEP! PEEEP! That’s it. It’s all over at San Siro, and Milan have, well… won. They didn’t play that well, and the penalty they were awarded to secure the points was absurd, but at least they’ve won, for just the third time in 2015. It moves them up to 7th in the provisional table, ahead of Inter amongst others, but let’s not draw too many conclusions from tonight because nothing has changed – unless you’re a Cagliari supporter, in which case you’re now even more doomed than you already were. Zeman will like some of the stuff they played, but they are their own worst enemy on so many occasions and have probably left themselves with too much to do at this stage. Serie B beckons.

So, does Pippo stay? I think it means he does, but if they lose against Palermo after the international break then I’m sure we’ll be straight back to this weekly ‘win or bust’ scenario. Looking forward to it already.

90+4 mins: Blimey. Are Milan trying to make sure this win doesn’t look too convincing? Cerci again scampers clear on the break as Cagliari seek a consolation goal, but Brkic wins the 1-v-1 battle. Pazzini was completely free alongside him to score into an empty net, but would you have passed to him after what he just did?

90+2 mins: Well now. Milan launch a 3-vs-1 counter-attack and Cerci does the right thing by squaring for a completely unmarked Pazzini, but somehow the substitute doesn’t score. He just passed it into Brkic’s midriff from six yards. Goodness.

90 mins: Four minutes separate Pippo Inzaghi and a 9th league win of the season. He’s safe. For now.

88 mins: Nigel de Jong’s first performance in four weeks has been a good one, as the Dutchman is taken off with two minutes to go. Michael Essien is on for a cameo, which is about as much as he deserves in his current state.

86 mins: Ceppitelli heads past the far post from a free-kick.

84 mins: Farias skies one miles wide from inside the box. Cagliari look beaten now. The TV directors have just shown another replay of the penalty incident, which gets worse every time you see it. Ah dear.

82 mins: Lovely Cagliari move, that. Joao Pedro slides the ball out to Cossu on the right, but the substitute can only bend his shot wide of the far post. They’re staying well and truly in trouble if this scoreline remains the same.

80 mins: That really is an extraordinarily bad decision from Tagliavento, and it’s probably going to keep Inzaghi safe from the sack for another couple of weeks. It wasn’t even close!

78 mins: GOAL!!! Milan 3-1 Cagliari (Penez): He has that nickname for a reason. That’s now eight successful spot-kicks from the Frenchman this season, which takes his overall tally up to 15. Game over, as the banner in the empty Curva behind the goal quite helpfully states.

77 mins: PENALTY TO MILAN! No, wait, is it? The referee might be about to change his mind. Not sure.

Nope, he isn’t, but my word he should have. Cerci is brought down by Ceppitelli after being slipped through on the break, but the foul was quite blatantly outside the box. Blatantly. Poor Cagliari.

75 mins: Off the bar! Cagliari finally create something with Milan sitting back and it very nearly pays off, but Joao Pedro can only find the top of the woodwork from Sau’s cut-back. Agonisingly close.

73 mins: Ekdal breaks from a Milan corner and gets pulled down by De Jong, who takes a booking for his troubles. Giampaolo Pazzini is next to enter the fray for the Rossoneri, and it’s Destro coming off after an extremely frustrating night. Little to no service whatsoever, again.

70 mins: Inzaghi’s first change sees Honda replaced by Alessio Cerci, which is receiving a few whistles from those who have turned up tonight. At least he’s not brought on a defender…

68 mins: The problem for them is that absolutely nothing is happening.

66 mins: Andrea Cossu replaces a disappointing M’Poku for the visitors. 25 minutes for Cagliari to earn some points they really could do with quite badly.

63 mins: 

60 mins: Cagliari keep getting caught on the break and just about surviving through luck instead of design. Not gonna work for another half-hour.

57 mins: Destro is this close to setting up Van Ginkel to score a third, but Brkic jumps on the ball just in time. Menez is playing very well now after an anonymous opening 15 minutes.

56 mins: Menez heads for the by-line and squares the ball, but a couple of lucky deflections save Cagliari and the danger is cleared. The visitors then break but Mexes is on hand to mop up. Impossibly stretched game at the moment.

53 mins: Poli’s cross is cleared as Milan keep the pressure on and win another corner. Surely, surely, surely they cannot screw this one up.

51 mins: Farias was booked somewhere in all that, presumably for dissent. How stupid Cagliari are to equalise and then defend like that from a corner. You just cannot give Philippe Mexes that much time and space in the box.

49 mins: GOAL!!! Milan 2-1 Cagliari (Mexes): Ha! Milan win a corner very soon after conceding and as the ball breaks loose to Mexes at the far post, the Frenchman steadies himself and unleashes a perfect volley into the ground and up into the far corner. He’s made amends already. Not a bad start to the second half, it must be said.

49 mins: 21 points dropped from winning positions.

47 mins: GOAL!!! Milan 1-1 Cagliari (Farias): Oh. Who could possibly have seen that coming? Not Milan’s defence, certainly, as it’s just been well and truly Zemaned almost straight from the restart. They were committing men to an attack and suddenly the visitors broke as Honda lost possession, and two incisive vertical passes later Farias is inside the box. With Abate caught up the field, he takes the opportunity to humiliate Mexes in a tragicomic one-on-one battle courtesy of a sharp turn in the box, before slotting the ball beyond an outstretched Diego Lopez. No less than they deserve, really, given how well they started.

2049: Joao Pedro is about to come on at half-time for Cagliari, which isn’t particularly surprising. He should probably have started. Gonzalez is going off. Off we go again. Hold on Milan!

2045: AS THINGS STAND: Cagliari will stay four points from safety, while Milan will move temporarily from 10th to 7th. And Pippo will stay.

2035: Philippe Mexes has just spoken briefly to Sky Italia at the side of the pitch, and said the word ‘confidence’ a lot. He’s learned well from his manager.

2033: HALF-TIME – Milan 1-0 Cagliari: And that’s that for 15 minutes. Cagliari started this game extremely well and have been getting significantly worse ever since, while the exact opposite can be said of Milan. Still, they’ve lost 21 points from winning positions this season so this ain’t over yet.

45+2 mins: Alejandro Gonzalez is booked for a sloppy foul out wide, but the resultant free-kick is wasted. Silence at San Siro.

45 mins: Two minutes of added time at the end of the half. A lot of sterile possession from the home side at the moment, but a 1-0 win is all they require tonight.

43 mins: A neat bit of skill from Diego Farias creates a chance for M’Poku to aim for goal from close range, but the Belgian misses the ball completely and it’s caught by Diego Lopez. He’s been pretty impressive since signing on loan from Al-Arabi in January, but has only scored once in that time. Not Zeman-y enough.

42 mins: Ignazio Abate stretches to keep a long diagonal from De Jong in play, but he can’t manage it. Milan look less terrible than they did half an hour ago though.

40 mins: Honda tests Brkic from 25 yards but it’s an easy catch for the Serbian. A shoutout at this point to Modibo Diakite, who’s playing a lot better than you’d expect any Zeman defender to play so far.

38 mins: Inzaghi applauds earnestly on the touchline as Menez plays in Antonelli, only for the Italian to stray offside. Up the other end, Danilo Avelar fires just wide from distance. Cagliari are being given a lot of space in front of Milan’s defence to do just that.

35 mins: Menez lays the ball off to Marco van Ginkel in a surprisingly selfless act, but the Dutchman blasts it over the bar. He’s been extremely unimpressive this season on loan from Chelsea, but tonight is the first time he’s started two league games in succession due to injuries and whatnot so he deserves a bit of slack. Poli has recovered by the way, so no substitution is needed.

32 mins: Keisuke Honda takes it, and promptly proves that he shouldn’t have. Goal-kick.

31 mins: Noise. It’s overrated in football grounds, I feel. Crisetig picks up the first booking of the game from referee Paolo Tagliavento, taking Menez out as he darted infield. He’s getting into his stride now. Milan free-kick, about 25 yards out in a central position.

28 mins: Diego Lopez catches the ensuing corner as Milan continue with 10 men.

27 mins: Panic stations in the home defence as Cagliari advance menacingly towards them with a round-shaped thing at their feet, and the end result is that Andrea Poli is down in some considerable pain. He might have taken a kick from one of his own team-mates as they tried to clear the ball, which would be incredible even for Milan.

24 mins: OK, now we’ve all got over our outrage let’s continue with the game. Milan look a little bit more confident now, but Cagliari aren’t going to change their approach and still have a good chance of causing them problems. They had another chance just before going behind, but Milan managed to scramble it clear at the far post.

21 mins: GOAL!!! Milan 1-0 Cagliari (Menez): But that was more like it! He’s not been in the game so far but Menez has broken the deadlock with a wonderful goal, cutting inside Donsah and curling the ball around Brkic as the Ghanaian failed to close him down. It’s a thing of beauty that’s completely out of context with how the game has gone so far, but BT Sport co-commentator Paul McVeigh has decided that what’s actually important is that Menez didn’t celebrate it, so let’s all lambast the Frenchman for that instead. WHAT A PIECE OF IDIOT.

20 mins: Destro launches a counter-attack on his own and quickly gets crowded out. I’m still amazed Roma let him go, with a record of one goal scored every 132 minutes in Serie A. He deserves better than this team.

19 mins: Just a shame that their passing is beyond woeful at the moment. Nobody appears to be able to find their target, and I’m not sure Jeremy Menez has touched the ball once in the opening 20 minutes. Meanwhile, Sau is down injured but should be OK to continue.

16 mins: Alejandro Gonzalez’s awful stray pass almost puts his side in danger as Antonelli springs into life again, but ultimately nothing happens. Meelan are in the game now.

14 mins: We might be waiting a whi- ah no, here we go. Ceppitelli is in action again as he beats Mattia Destro to Milan’s next corner, clearing the danger by heading over. If anyone is to score past Gonzalo Brkic tonight then it’s likely to be the Italian, given that he’s scored 4 goals in 4 games against Cagliari before today.

11 mins: Some good covering from Nigel de Jong brings the next Cagliari offensive to an end, after a couple of risible attempts to clear the ball from Philippe Mexes and Gabriel Paletta. It’s a 0-0 hammering so far, but let’s just wait until Cagliari have some actual defending to do before judging this match.

9 mins: Now it has. Hooray! Luca Antonelli sprints down the left in typical fashion and wins a corner off Luca Ceppitelli. It comes to nothing, but let’s not run before we can walk here.

8 mins: The ball has literally spent about three seconds in the Cagliari half so far, and that was when their centre-backs were passing it between each other in the centre circle.

6 mins: And now they should be behind. Lorenzo Crisetig, on loan from Inter, cuts the ball across perfectly for Zeman’s Favourite Student Marco Sau in the box, but he pumps it wide from 12 yards. Bad miss.

5 mins: Not sure Milan have touched the ball in the Cagliari half yet.

2 mins: Cagliari win a free-kick within 90 seconds and Paul-Jose M’Poku wallops it into the empty Curva. Fascinated to see who out of The Team Who Can’t Defend and The Team Who Won’t Defend comes out on top tonight. This will not end 0-0.

1946: PEEEEEEP. Cagliari, with nine players stood on the halfway line as always, get the game under way as they kick from left to right.

1943: Teams are coming out at San Siro, which looks about as full of fans as it always does. The boycott’s worked then. Milan haven’t had this few wins (8) after 27 games in a season since 1984 but Pippo needs one badly tonight. Apparently. Unless Berlusconi and Galliani subject him to more public torture by postponing the inevitable again. Galliani has just spoken to Sky Italia and reiterated that Pippo is his man, who he hopes does well in these final 11 league games, but he also noted that 35 points from 27 outings is ‘extremely little’.

1939: Milan team news: two changes from the side that lost to Fiorentina late on last week. Michael Essien is replaced by Nigel de Jong, who’s back from injury, while Andrea Poli returns from suspension to take the place of the injured Giacomo Bonaventura, who scored a quite wonderful (but unintentional) goal in that 1-1 draw back in October. For Cagliari, Zdenek Zeman has made four changes from the side that drew with Empoli: Nicola Murru, Antonio Balzano, Daniele Dessena and Joao Pedro are out, replaced respectively by Alejandro Gonzalez, Danilo Avelar, Albin Ekdal and the magnificently-named Ghanaian wonder-kid Godfred Donsah. The omission of Joao Pedro is rather surprisingly given how well he played last week, but Ekdal is a worthy replacement, having scored a hat-trick in that demolition job of Inter the last time they were at San Siro. Kick-off in 5 minutes.

Oh, and by the way: this game is effectively going to be played behind closed doors, because Milan’s Curva Sud published a statement yesterday (translation here) in which they told everyone to boycott the match. Instead, where the ultras would normally be stood, there is a sign that reads ‘Game Over. Insert a coin and save AC Milan.’ Which is nice.

1935: TEAMS – Milan v Cagliari:

Meeeelan (4-3-3): Lopez; Abate, Paletta, Mexes, Antonelli; Van Ginkel, De Jong, Poli; Honda, Destro, Menez. Subs: Abbiati, Gori, Albertazzi, Alex, Bonera, Bocchetti, Muntari, Essien, Mastalli, Suso, Cerci, Pazzini.

Cagliari (0-0-10): Brkic; Gonzalez, Ceppitelli, Diakite, Avelar; Donsah, Crisetig, Ekdal; Farias, Sau, M’Poku. Subs: Colombi, Cragno, Pisano, Murru, Rossettini, Conti, Dessena, Joao Pedro, Husbauer, Cossu, Cop, Longo.

Referee: Paolo Tagliavento

1930: Good evening and welcome to the latest edition of The Game Filippo Inzaghi Absolutely Definitely 100% Must Win To Avoid The Sack Until Silvio Berlusconi Realises There Is No One Better To Take Over And Leaves Him In Charge For Another Week After All. That’s what I’m calling it anyway.

Really though. This is getting a bit silly now isn’t it? Let’s recap what’s happened in the last couple of months at Milan. First, they had to beat Lazio in the quarter-finals of the Coppa Italia for Inzaghi to keep his job. They didn’t, but he stayed anyway. Then, they had to beat Cesena for him to keep his job. They did, and he stayed. Then, they had to beat Verona for him to keep his job. They didn’t, but he stayed anyway. Then, they had to avoid defeat against Fiorentina for him to keep his job. They didn’t, but he stayed anyway. Tonight, they face relegation-threatened Cagliari at San Siro and Inzaghi, a man Louis van Gaal might refer to as an ‘ex-legend’ amongst the Rossoneri faithful, has been told he must win in order to keep his job. Yeah right. If he’s managed to remain in charge this long despite failing to heed three of his last four final warnings, there’s no reason to believe the papers this time around.

That said, if not tonight it’s going to happen eventually. We all know poor Pippo has no future at this club in a managerial capacity, partly because Galliani and Berlusconi are only capable of thinking in the extreme short-term but partly also because he’s just so out of his depth at this stage in his career. Watching him on the touchlines of Italy this season has been a painful experience, as the man who had so much goodwill towards him within the club last summer has gradually pushed himself toward the brink, making mistake after mistake without appearing to ever learn from them. It’s going to end in tears at some point, because Milan are getting worse not better under Inzaghi’s management, and for that reason maybe we should take seriously the reports that a bad result this evening might finally see him out on his suave backside. That and also the fact there’s an international break after this weekend, which would give them a healthy amount of time to sort a replacement out. A win is a must.

If we’re talking purely in terms of the table though, this game is a lot more important for their opponents, because while Milan’s season is already over (they’re 10th and 10 points off a European spot at kick-off), Cagliari are staring Serie B squarely in the fizzod as their players take to the San Siro pitch tonight. Four points might not sound like much, and perhaps it isn’t, but the psychological hammer blow that was the 93rd-minute equaliser they conceded to Empoli seven days ago – coupled with their quite incredible decision to sack Gianfranco Zola and rehire Zdenek Zeman because they didn’t want to start paying anyone else – means it’s pretty hard to mount a case for them surviving at the moment. If you ignore the headlines, they’re the ones that desperately need a result here – and actually, it might be within reach. They took a point off Milan in the reverse fixture back in October, and on their last trip to San Siro they smashed Inter 4-1. Could Zemanlandia strike again? Maybe. If it does, you can stick that fork in Pippo and direct him to the nearest exit.

Kick-off: 7.45pm.